We’ve all heard of food envy; that feeling when you’re sat in a restaurant and your food arrives and you’re perfectly content with your decision and then your companion’s food arrives and all you can think is ‘I really should have ordered that’! Always made worse when they sit there exclaiming that it tastes just as good as it looks. Well, in the past week I’ve experienced tube envy.
I spend approximately two hours a day commuting two and from work and I people watch for a lot of that time. Now, in my first few weeks people watching involved adjusting to the weird and wonderful characters you come across in London. I realised today that now I sit/stand there getting ‘tube envy’! Let me explain with three things that are top of my envy list:
1. People who have mastered the art of standing with five people within about 15cm of their body at all angles yet can still comfortably read the Metro. How? They have clearly had years of practice as they, with the grace of a swan, fold their paper into various ways in order to avoid a boring journey. This morning I ended up using my paper as a barrier between myself and the guy in front – we were so close I didn’t have to hold it.
2. The older generation who look so content reading a BOOK, or engaging in conversation with another human-being instead of playing Candy Crush on an iPad or listening to music that is so loud that when the train is quiet you can hear Beyonce blasting out ‘Listen’. I wish I could justify sparking up conversations with random people without others thinking I was a weirdo, for some reason the over 60s are allowed.
3. The men that hear the beeping noise of the doors closing yet see that as a challenge to dive into the carriage, or as I now call then ‘superman’. To the man this morning on the northern line that did this with the brightest blue eyes, if you read this…. Anyway, those men…one day I hope to have the courage to risk getting my head chopped off for the sake of waiting a minute!
Along with envy comes the ‘glad im not them’ but that’s another blog…